Color me, “not impressed.” — I, for one, am certainly not jealous of Paul Rudd’s anti-aging prowess. Until Paul Rudd’s secrets are uncovered, (and you know it will be something involving absorbing the souls of Rihanna’s children or sucking the life force from dolphins) I’m left with no choice but to elaborate further on why…

We offer these guidelines to survive this brutal encounter. It cannot be emphasized enough that our best advice is to avoid being anywhere, at any time, within a 10-mile radius of the ruthless conductor and seasonal sexual predator Lydia Tár. …

And I’m not just saying that to get you back in the office. — Good morning, you enterprising, paradigm-disrupting, corporate warriors! Can you believe Coachella dropped their dope-ass lineup for the 2023 festival the same week we’re having this mandatory company-wide Zoom? What kismet! I am obsessed with this company’s future almost as much as I’m obsessed with Blackpink. They’re a musical headliner at…

A list of plastic products I’ve stopped using since we’re all gonna die soon anyway. HOUSEHOLD CLEANING PRODUCTS Some of the most toxic things in your home are the cleaning products under your kitchen sink. That’s why I stopped storing them under the sink and started keeping them in my…

This Tuesday was Super… exhausting. Southern California still really likes to vote on Tuesday. We had a steady stream of voters all day. We only had two short instances where we had a line, but it was far and away the busiest day. We had a handful of new voters…

The day I learned too much. The polls opened today and apparently, so did our personal lives. If you have a kooky coworker or neighbor and you can’t really pinpoint what their odd thing is, but your gut says, “I bet that person is into some weird stuff,” I’m here…

“Mega-flex” is not just me bragging about the time Jennifer Aniston hugged me. Day two at our polling place felt a little more relaxed. We’d had a day to figure out how not to botch democracy by doing the procedures in the right order on the first try. …

The day I turned 10,000 years old. After completing a three-hour online training session, and a three-hour in-person training session, as well as being offered a variety of non-mandatory, but highly encouraged, online supporting training courses, I’ve begun my service as a county election poll worker! (Cue the half-hearted applause.)…

Not to be confused with a pole worker. Long have I wanted to deal with the general public in a setting that brings up my worst childhood memories. That’s right — I’m going to work in my county as a poll worker. And I’m gonna do it at a chronically…